My heart doesn’t care about him. My mind is mad at him. My body just wants to do him. TSM.

Smirking to stop yourself from saying something bitchy. TSM.

The eye roll becoming a reflex. TSM.

Being able to shower, do your hair, pick out an outfit, and put on makeup blacked out. TSM.

“No, it’s fine. You can’t get drunk if there’s no koozie.” TSM.

Drinking a bottle of wine like it’s a bottle of water. TSM.

My calorie tracking app needs a “midnight drunk meal” option. TSM.