What doesn’t kill you makes you blonder. TSM.

Taking “you’re such a stereotypical sorority girl” as a compliment. TSM.

I’m fluent in English, sarcasm, passive aggressiveness, and flirting. TSM.

Being on all of your hookups’ Snapchat best friends list. TSM.

Finding any excuse to add glitter. TSM.

When you haven’t slept in your own bed in days. TSTC.

Having a your ex-boyfriend’s pledge pick you up from your new boyfriend’s fraternity house. TSM.

“This goes out to the ladies at breakfast in last night’s dress.” TSM.