“Does this outfit make me look like I’d make a good wife?” TSM.

Consulting both your planner and your best friend before making any life decision, big or small. TSM.

Dress to the nines. Sparkle like a ten. TSM.

Turning your letter shirt inside out for the walk of shame, because you respect your sorority enough not to shame it, but not enough to keep you from doing the shameful thing. TSM.

Getting “yell at the bouncer for not accepting your Panera card as an acceptable form of photo ID” drunk. TSM.

Being a clue in a fraternity’s scavenger hunt. TSM.

Drinking to forget the work *week.

*out TSM.

Drunk enough to make wildly embarrassing decisions. Not drunk enough to forget them. TSM.

Blacking out is God’s way of saying, “Don’t worry about it.” TSM.

Controlling his zipper and his wallet. TSM.