Just made an account to disagree strongly with account below that includes “permission to touch me before you can” belief is a very damaged person who will never enjoy passion.“
Nope, legally, a person touching another person is assault. Doesn’t matter the age——and that’s what we need to teach all people, beginning from that age. In the same way that a person sticking an erect penis into someone else that is too drunk to consent is rape.
I empathize with the author because I, too, hesitate to describe myself as having been raped—but after friends, the police, and college staff supported me and listened to me, I accepted that sexual assault takes many more forms than the type we immediately think about—violent, from a stranger. That is a MINORITY of cases, but the randomness of it makes us feel safe—stay away from strangers and you won’t get raped.
You are brave to process and share this; all those accounts are disturbing and I hope you are well now. Your hesitancy is the same hesitancy that many educated women with violent partners feel—we’re too smart for this to happen to us! But it does, and we’ve got to start talking to young men, boys, about the truth.
Remember that statistics show that rapists commit that act an average of 14 times. This has nothing to do with you and your reactions; swimsuits don’t just fall off. Some people are just bad with boundaries, and our society reinforces their agency.
This author is not asking for a ruling; all of these are assault/rape, and she is sharing the emotional complexity of her experience.
Just made an account to disagree strongly with account below that includes “permission to touch me before you can” belief is a very damaged person who will never enjoy passion.“
Nope, legally, a person touching another person is assault. Doesn’t matter the age——and that’s what we need to teach all people, beginning from that age. In the same way that a person sticking an erect penis into someone else that is too drunk to consent is rape.
I empathize with the author because I, too, hesitate to describe myself as having been raped—but after friends, the police, and college staff supported me and listened to me, I accepted that sexual assault takes many more forms than the type we immediately think about—violent, from a stranger. That is a MINORITY of cases, but the randomness of it makes us feel safe—stay away from strangers and you won’t get raped.
You are brave to process and share this; all those accounts are disturbing and I hope you are well now. Your hesitancy is the same hesitancy that many educated women with violent partners feel—we’re too smart for this to happen to us! But it does, and we’ve got to start talking to young men, boys, about the truth.
Remember that statistics show that rapists commit that act an average of 14 times. This has nothing to do with you and your reactions; swimsuits don’t just fall off. Some people are just bad with boundaries, and our society reinforces their agency.