Welcoming the awkward eye contact with the girl in your biology that lab you didn’t bid. TSM.

When your voice is completely gone from recruitment practice, but you still have to lip sync everything. TSM.

Your dad calling about outrageous charges on your credit card at the beginning of every fall semester. TSM.

Popping an Adderall so you can Facebook stalk PNMs with greater efficiency. TSM.

There’s no wine in my calorie counter’s database, so I’m taking that to mean it doesn’t count. TSM.

Always wearing pearl earrings, even when you’re just in norts and a frocket. TSM.

Discussing a PNM’s heavy eyeliner as if she literally offended you with it. TSM.

Locking eyes with him while everyone sings Wagon Wheel so he knows you mean business. TSM.

Setting hater records during recruitment. TSM.

The shame only lasts as long as the stamp on your hand. TSM.

He’s just not my cup of sweet tea vodka. TSM.

When taking things to the “next level” means drinking wine and making out on the roof of his house. TSM.

The higher the heels, the further he falls. TSM.

Cinderella by day, sin-derella by night. TSM.

Knowing you’re doing recruitment right when you go to lunch and a little girl asks if you’re princesses. TSM.

Reading “proceed to cart” as “send cart to Daddy.” TSM.

Demanding to be wined and dined…mostly wined. TSM.

Looking prettier in outrageous bid day outfits than most girls do in their Sunday best. TSM.

A little part of you feeling offended when he doesn’t screenshot your Snapchat. TSM.

“She’s not in a sorority? No, I don’t know her.” TSM.