Going for men with labs and lavs. TSM.

My neck and my face always match. TSM.

Knowing font names for t-shirt designing purposes. TSM.

Knowing how much more productive you were with Facebook deactivated for recruitment, and not caring. TSM.

Teetering the fine line between sassy and bitchy. TSM.

Do you remember your first sorority squat? TSM.

Being called to standards the first chapter of the semester. TSM.

Being less of a Marilyn and more of a Jackie…but blonde, with big boobs. TSM.

Making a flow chart to decide who you are taking to crush. TSM.

My mom says I need to take a sedative before shopping online. TSM.

Sorority does come before student in the dictionary. TSM.

The difference between me and her is I can make him smile with my clothes on. TSM.

Having perfect handwriting is exhausting, really. TSM.

Always looking recruitment ready. TSM.

Rating PNMs with the terms “glitter” or “beige.” TSM.

I just care about getting on the JumboTron. I don’t actually care about the game at all. TSM.

Can’t be awake and alert for classes at 11:00am, but can be awake and alert for recruitment at 6:00am. TSM.

Dear Sisters, If you complain about the fact that your feet hurt because of recruitment one more time, I will punch you. Sincerely, Your Recruitment Director. TSM.

People really need to stop telling on me. That’s my problem. TSM.

Don’t expect me to help you remember our night. TSM.