It’s not creeping, it’s research. TSM.

Tweeting about coming home and immediately getting texts from all of my high school hookups. TSM.

Drunk tweets. #TSM

If you have nothing mean to say, don’t say anything at all. TSM.

Salad without low fat ranch? Bless your heart. TSM.

If there isn’t a shirt for it, it didn’t happen. TSM.

I have to clean my room today or else daddy will be mad. Jk, the maid comes in an hour. TSM.

If our sorority doesn’t get a Lilly print, I’m going out to drink. If we do get a Lilly print, I’m definitely going out to drink. TSM.

Cuddle Whore. TSM.

Getting an entire storage unit for the summer for the presents you received from your big. TSM.

I only wear sweatpants in public during finals week. Just kidding, sweatpants are disgusting. TSM.

Cropping out cups like it’s my job. TSM.

“You look just like your mother” is a compliment. TSM.

Your 5″ inseams make me want to take my norts off. TSM.

“But mom, this dress is for church, not football games.” TSM.

Studying for geology final, the only rock I care about is the one going on my left hand. TSM.

Just received a finals care package from daddy with vyvanse, a purse, and a new credit card. TSM.

Shopping for new spring clothes absolutely does not involve a trip to Old Navy. TSM.

I can never make up my mind, I just judge every one else’s choices. TSM.

My sorority isn’t in the running for a Lilly print anymore 🙁 Just kidding, we already have one. TSM.