The only thing I’ve used my Microbiology textbook for is to paint my nails on. TSM.

Two ears, two studs. That is all. TSM.

Drinking wine out of the bottle is the new pink. TSM.

Sorry Jared, my frat daddy went to Tiffany. TSM.

I take notes in three shades of pink. TSM.

I woke up this morning on the bathroom floor in the frat castle. Ultimate Shack. TSM.

Everything in our fridge is either a sandwich ingredient, fat-free, or alcoholic. TSM.

I crop because I care. TSM.

The only reason I can’t wear size 0 dresses is because my boobs are too big. TSM.

Pink adderall and matching hair bow. TSM.

Going home for spring break because I live where you vacation. TSM

I never had any issues finding shoe boxes for school projects. TSM.

The word “budget” is not in my vocabulary. TSM.

If the event isn’t in my Lilly planner, it probably isn’t worth attending. TSM.

Saturday morning brunch with bottomless mimosas. TSM.

Drunk exercising. TSM.

Every time Big/Little week rolls around, my wedding party gets bigger. TSM.

Wanting to rip the bows and pearls off every GDI I see. TSM.

Cropping you out. TSM.

My dorm is having a fire drill right now. Good thing I’m shacking at the frat house. TSM.