The calories don’t count if you can’t remember them. TSM.

Typing up an essay on your phone outside of the bar, and still getting an A. TSM.

Being told you’re not a “typical sorority girl” and feeling confused and offended, because you absolutely are. TSM.

Cheap beer, expensive, well, everything else. TSM.

Sending out a booty call in the late afternoon, because day drinking. TSM.

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of alcohol. TSM.

Being legitimately scared to watch your Snapchat story the next day. TSM.

Spring break bucket list: survive. TSM.

Fifty shades of blackout. TSM.

“I just like him so much that I feel like I’ve had ten drinks today. And I’ve only had six.” -Phoebe Buffay. TSM.