Speaking at a fraternity chapter meeting and trying not to think about how many of them you’ve made out with. TSM.

If it doesn’t have your monogram on it, is it really even yours? TSM.

I don’t believe in pre-nups, just like I don’t believe in returning shack shirts. TSM.

The best place to make Panhellenic friends is in a fraternity bathroom. TSM.

No one goes harder than ex-exec. TSM.

Darty Season: 1 Me: -13. TSM.

Automatically hating any girl who walks into “your” fraternity. TSM.

Being “unable to even” on a regular basis. TSM.

Stalking the shit out of your online purchases until they arrive at your door. TSM.

Drinking the awkward away. TSM.