Always making it to the pregame. Rarely making it to the event. TSM.

I’ll drink responsibly when there’s a brand of vodka called “Responsibly.” TSM.

Fan girling over your little on every form of social media. TSM.

Fighting for the biggest bed on spring break, but never actually sleeping in it. TSM.

Going to the gym, only to realize you accidentally grabbed a water bottle filled with vodka. TSTC.

Having an ever-growing collection of single earrings you refuse to get rid of. TSM.

Always getting hammered and occasionally getting nailed. TSM.

“Lord, grant me the caffeine to handle the things I can, and the wine to handle the things I can’t.” TSM.