There needs to be a Facebook Family option for ‘Big’ and ‘Little.’ TSM.

Your fratdaddy knowing that he can laugh at misogynistic TFMs all day, but if he ever treated you unkindly, he’d be ironing his own shirts and making his own sandwiches in a heartbeat. TSM.

My sorority was founded before “sorority” was even a word. TSM.

I’m not a slampiece, I’m a take-home-to-meet-the-fam-piece. TSM.

None of my friends got pregnant in high school. TSM.

The only boys that can get below my Mason-Dixon Line are those who have pledged under it. TSM.

I don’t dye my hair or starve myself to stay thin. I don’ t look down upon lower tier sororities. I’m not getting my MRS degree but an MBA instead. I can make a fantastic sandwich, award winning cupcakes and unbutton an Oxford and khakis with one hand. TSM.

Okay geed, you may think I “bought” my friends but at least I don’t have to take photos of myself in the bathroom just so there’s pictures of me on Facebook. TSM.

Being a Jackie, not a Marilyn. TSM.

I’m conservative everywhere except the bedroom. TSM.