Piss me off and I’ll put glitter in your AC vents. TSM.

Speaking at a fraternity chapter meeting and trying not to think about how many of them you’ve made out with. TSM.

Turning fraternity brothers into eskimo brothers. TSTC.

Continuing to wear his shack shirt to remind his new girlfriend who’s boss. TSM.

Carefully choosing your composite time based on your drinking schedule. TSM.

Only using your textbooks to prevent your sewn letters from wrinkling. TSM.

I don’t believe in pre-nups, just like I don’t believe in returning shack shirts. TSM.

The casual “By the way, I’m wearing your clothes” text. TSM.

Stalking the shit out of your online purchases until they arrive at your door. TSM.

Being in a sorority is a lifestyle. TSM.