Always stay hungry. Never act thirsty. TSM.

Knowing the exact date your favorite fraternity gets off probation. TSM.

“How old are you?”
“Well, this weekend I’m 21.” TSM.

Fighting for your right to dance on elevated surfaces. TSM.

Turning up just to turn ’em all down. TSM.

Becoming attached to his cooler after painting it for so long. TSM.

No bra, no problem. TSTC.

They say diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but an AMEX and a margarita are a close second. TSM.