Go home, Standards. I’m drunk. TSM.

Referring to your boyfriend’s big as your big-in-law. TSM.

Knowing which drink is yours by the lipstick stain. TSM.

Standards:”Thanks for coming tonight.”
Me:”Yes, well thanks for inviting me.” TSTC.

1: “Do you workout?”
2: “I mean I sorority squat in like ever picture.” TSTC.

Drunk texting with the Greek keyboard. TSM.

“Are you dressing cute, or no?” TSM.