Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because he was tall and in a good fraternity, and he’ll probably text you again at 2:34am this Saturday. TSM.

It’s not what you know, it’s what you throw. TSM.

Greek mythology: “There are no rivalries between sororities.” TSTC.

I’ll drink responsibly when there’s a brand of vodka called “Responsibly.” TSM.

Every empty bottle has a story. TSM.