Am I crazy, or does wine actually taste better straight out of the bottle? TSM.

“One more shot, then we can go.” TSM.

Spending half an hour stalking your own social media because you just find yourself that hilarious. TSTC.

Looking around the room for subtle clues as to what the hell happened last night. TSM.

“Of course I’ve never hooked up with him sober. What is he, my husband?” TSM.

Floating on a pool doughnut, because you can’t eat real doughnuts. TSM.

Your Starbucks account being connected to your dad’s PayPal account. TSM.

Friday’s face made possible by Thursday night’s makeup. TSM.

The majority of your back-to-school supplies consisting of clothes and makeup. TSM.

Having a pink, glittery bong. TSM.

Bid Day being the second best holiday of the year. Your birthday being the first. TSM.

Resting bitch face runs in my family. TSM.

Sprinkles are the glitter of the baking world. TSM.

Knowing you’ll give in, but making him beg anyway. TSM.

“I hate him. I miss him. Let’s get drunk so I can call him.” TSM.

He’s number three on my Snapchat but number one in my heart. TSM.

Voting the slate down because of one bitch. TSTC.

Making a fitness board on Pinterest is pretty much the same as working out, right? TSM.

Knowing which day of the week to go to which frat party. TSM.

May your memories always be positive and your pregnancy tests always be negative. TSM.