Making up irrelevant alliterations so you can drink every day of the week. TSM.

Blocking the standards board and president from your Snapchat stories. TSM.

Perfecting the art of hiding your drink while taking photos. TSM.

Filtering the drunk out of photos. TSM.

FLOWER HEADBANDS AREN’T STUPID. YOU ARE. TSM.

Spending more time making an outfit than wearing it. TSM.

Your credit card company flagging charges for school books because they are “unusual.” TSM.

Knowing the way to his heart is through his liver. TSM.

Still getting nervous when you see your old standards chair walking out of the liquor store, even after you’ve graduated. TSM.

“I heard that bar was closing, and I actually cried.” TSM.