Vodka in a wine glass. TSM.

Getting a bitch’s high from a perfectly passive aggressive subtweet. TSM.

Being the senior that they both fear and aspire to be. TSM.

Your parents being categorically unable to tell your sisters apart. TSTC.

I make shit show look good. TSM.

Being able to borrow a fake from anyone in your family, because your whole lineage looks alike. TSM.

“Why were we that drunk on a Monday?” TSM.

Getting the entire bar to sing “Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue” to your boyfriend when he gets home from Afghanistan. TSM.