Calling your big’s boyfriend “Dad.” TSM.

Sleeping with the social chair to improve the mixer theme. TSM.

Forgetting you aren’t actually 21. TSM.

Having a draft day for formal dates. TSM.

Sending pictures of your potential formal dates to your mom so she can chose. TSM.

Never having to pay the cover. TSM.

That raging jealousy you feel when your big takes a picture with another girl in your pledge class. TSM.

Piss me off and I’ll put glitter in your AC vents. TSM.

I like my men well-raised and well-hazed. TSM.