Getting more fraternity shirts from recruitment than from shacking. TSM.

Blackmailing your standards chair so you don’t have to go to standards. TSM.

Playing the summer hookup game better than the boys. TSM.

“It’s like we never left.” TSM.

Trolling Tinder because you know a fraternity’s conference is in town. TSM.

It’s not a drinking problem, it’s a drinking solution. TSM.

Spending all summer purchasing potential first-day-of-class outfits, then wearing one you buy on a last-minute mall run. TSM.

Volunteering to drink everyone’s “extra” wine during wine tasting, because you’re so generous. TSM.

Don’t lose hope. There’s always another fraternity. TSM.

Saying “TSTC” instead of “YOLO.” TSM.