“I know who your big is.” TSM.

“I feel like you’re official without actually being official.” TSM.

Having class when you’re not in class. TSM.

Making up irrelevant alliterations so you can drink every day of the week. TSM.

Blocking the standards board and president from your Snapchat stories. TSM.

Perfecting the art of hiding your drink while taking photos. TSM.

Filtering the drunk out of photos. TSM.

Is it still hazing if I want to do it? TSM.

FLOWER HEADBANDS AREN’T STUPID. YOU ARE. TSM.

Spending more time making an outfit than wearing it. TSM.