Boho. NS. Bow Ho. TSM.

“I heard that bar was closing, and I actually cried.” TSM.

His pledges, my perks. TSM.

Margarita Monday. Tequila Tuesday. Wine Wednesday. Tonic Thursday. Fireball Friday. TSM.

There aren’t many things I can’t do, and the list only gets shorter once I’ve had a few shots. TSM.

Keeping your heart and your Starbucks on ice. TSM.

I’m not an alcoholic. I’m just a soberphobic. TSM.

Viewing a hookup as a means of strengthening relations with other houses. TSM.

How will you know when you’re ready to have kids? When you don’t panic at the thought of being sober for 9 months. TSTC.