I don’t take it personally and I think you’re partially right on this but I also disagree. Men are totally different than women, I was thinking about if this person came to my chapter. We really do our best to recruit based on values but there is also a factor of if you get along like you said. But we also say yes to girls who we might not necessarily see ourselves being best friends with, but we know will contribute to our chapter. I personally think that for us, and for me as a person, giving a bid to a transgendered person would be relative to how they act. If they are rude or inappropriate, I wouldn’t give a pity bid just because she’s different. I would give a bid only if I felt like she was a great person and had potential to be successful in our chapter.
This is awesome! I do drink, but I also have no problem offering to drive most of the time because I truly believe you can have just as much fun sober. I drink mostly to wind down I get drunk rarely.
You’re right and that’s what makes this all so difficult. The “segregation” you’re referring to as I understand is that we want people who are accomplished, hard working, involved, caring, etc. those are the standards my sisters and I judge people against before voting to give them a bid. Yet when PNMs go through recruitment and are a minority, some of them assume that they’re being judged on that if they don’t receive a bid when really, it’s probably because they were rude or talking about partying/drinking too much. We try to recruit on values and if you don’t fall in with those values, then sorry we don’t want you. But that’s not always what it seems on the outside. It comes back to the fact that everyone these days is so easily offended and they jump to the conclusion that you’re being prejudiced when really you’re just looking for people who will help bring your chapter and fraternity to success. It has nothing to do with race, gender identity, sexual orientation or anything else superficial.
I noticed that in her ESPY speech too. I thought maybe hormones she was taking might start to effect her voice? Laverne Cox’s voice sounds feminine to me.
I relate to this in a way but I find that what I’m looking for seems to be more than what guys my age are. It’s almost like being the “take home to mom” girl gets me the respect I want and deserve but the guys don’t want that kind of relationship yet. They’re looking for more casual. Which is fine I’m totally comfortable with myself. But I don’t think guys are all running to date me or someone like me. And because I am that kind of girl I’m also strong willed and don’t settle for a relationship that I’m not feeling fulfilled in.
Your title is “I broke my boyfriend’s heart for no reason” and I think that’s completely inaccurate. You weren’t fulfilled in the relationship. That’s a reason and a perfectly valid one. If I put myself in his shoes, I wouldn’t want someone staying me because they feel bad. I want someone to be with me because he wants me.
You did the respectable thing and while his heart may have been broken, you respected your relationship with him enough to break it off before you cheated on him. You 100% did the right thing and maybe it’s a little selfish but love is something to be selfish about.
I agree. That is NOT a sorority girl. That’s a girl that was once in a sorority and will no longer be affiliated with respectable, philanthropic women.
This is absolutely the most powerful article I have read on TSM thus far. I also read that article in Marie Claire and it made my blood boil. I don’t think I could’ve countered it with as much class and personal touch as you did. Absolutely phenomenal. Your experience in Greek life is very similar to mine.
I don’t think I’m “way off base,” I think that I just have the unpopular opinion, which is fine. I didn’t say she shouldn’t take responsibility for her actions, she’s an adult. But I do think that how we are raised plays a huge factor on how we handle certain things. I guess I just don’t understand why they’d give her $90,000 upfront and didn’t just pay for her tuition as the bills come. If she blew the money like that I doubt she never showed signs of poor monetary judgement in the past.
What a brat. But her parents ARE partially at fault. They completely enabled her! Who just gives a 20 something $90,000… She seems like the kind of girl who’s never had a job in her life because she clearly does not understand the value of a dollar. As much as I hated that my parents made me get a job the day I turned 15 and pay for most of my own things, I’m glad they taught me personal responsibility and that money doesn’t grow on trees. I wouldn’t be surprised if this girl marries some rich controlling man who treats her like crap one day. It’s really sad.
As an outgoing senior I’d like to lend some advice to you. First, TSM is a satirical website. Although there is truth to this post it is exaggerated and there is a sense of humor in it. Second, being a PNM is scary! But that’s why you have awesome recruitment counselors who are carefully selected. They’re the best of the best. When you meet yours, don’t be afraid to express your concerns!
While many parts of recruitment are staged (such as what you wear), it is a tried and true process. Not everyone loves it! But at the end of the day, the purpose is to find girls who will make awesome additions to their chapters and will also listen, learn, and grow.
The kind of girl that Lucky Jo is highlighting in this column just hates all the frilly stuff. The reality is, she’s still going to take a breath before you enter, and when she speaks to you in recruitment, she’s going to talk to you like she talks to every other girl. And if she sees you fitting into her sorority, she’s gonna keep talking and asking and answering questions and it will feel effortless. While she may hate the outfits and the songs, she doesn’t hate YOU. She wants to like you! She wants to meet girls and think “wow, she NEEDS a bid!” Please don’t feel discouraged. Recruitment is a weird thing for everyone involved. But you will find your home and your time won’t be wasted. I really hope this eases some of your concerns!
I thought about this exact accusation myself as I watched the speech again this morning but the original source that this story came from Radar online which is a completely illegitimate source. I did my own research, looked around as much as possible and found that there is absolutely nothing valid about this awful accusation. Not to mention any avid KUWTK watchers know that if anything Bruce always had integrity and I expect in her new life as Caitlin that wouldn’t change. Whether you agree with whether or not she should’ve won the award, it’s not okay to accuse her of manipulating the media for it.
Wow. After his “helpful” maneuver I think it would’ve been totally appropriate for you to free that vomit all over him. Clearly you’re a trooper. Bless.
I don’t take it personally and I think you’re partially right on this but I also disagree. Men are totally different than women, I was thinking about if this person came to my chapter. We really do our best to recruit based on values but there is also a factor of if you get along like you said. But we also say yes to girls who we might not necessarily see ourselves being best friends with, but we know will contribute to our chapter. I personally think that for us, and for me as a person, giving a bid to a transgendered person would be relative to how they act. If they are rude or inappropriate, I wouldn’t give a pity bid just because she’s different. I would give a bid only if I felt like she was a great person and had potential to be successful in our chapter.
This is awesome! I do drink, but I also have no problem offering to drive most of the time because I truly believe you can have just as much fun sober. I drink mostly to wind down I get drunk rarely.
You’re right and that’s what makes this all so difficult. The “segregation” you’re referring to as I understand is that we want people who are accomplished, hard working, involved, caring, etc. those are the standards my sisters and I judge people against before voting to give them a bid. Yet when PNMs go through recruitment and are a minority, some of them assume that they’re being judged on that if they don’t receive a bid when really, it’s probably because they were rude or talking about partying/drinking too much. We try to recruit on values and if you don’t fall in with those values, then sorry we don’t want you. But that’s not always what it seems on the outside. It comes back to the fact that everyone these days is so easily offended and they jump to the conclusion that you’re being prejudiced when really you’re just looking for people who will help bring your chapter and fraternity to success. It has nothing to do with race, gender identity, sexual orientation or anything else superficial.
I noticed that in her ESPY speech too. I thought maybe hormones she was taking might start to effect her voice? Laverne Cox’s voice sounds feminine to me.
I 100% agree.
I liked the verdict on your last example. The two are definitely not mutually exclusive.
I relate to this in a way but I find that what I’m looking for seems to be more than what guys my age are. It’s almost like being the “take home to mom” girl gets me the respect I want and deserve but the guys don’t want that kind of relationship yet. They’re looking for more casual. Which is fine I’m totally comfortable with myself. But I don’t think guys are all running to date me or someone like me. And because I am that kind of girl I’m also strong willed and don’t settle for a relationship that I’m not feeling fulfilled in.
Your title is “I broke my boyfriend’s heart for no reason” and I think that’s completely inaccurate. You weren’t fulfilled in the relationship. That’s a reason and a perfectly valid one. If I put myself in his shoes, I wouldn’t want someone staying me because they feel bad. I want someone to be with me because he wants me.
You did the respectable thing and while his heart may have been broken, you respected your relationship with him enough to break it off before you cheated on him. You 100% did the right thing and maybe it’s a little selfish but love is something to be selfish about.
I agree. That is NOT a sorority girl. That’s a girl that was once in a sorority and will no longer be affiliated with respectable, philanthropic women.
This is gold.
This is absolutely the most powerful article I have read on TSM thus far. I also read that article in Marie Claire and it made my blood boil. I don’t think I could’ve countered it with as much class and personal touch as you did. Absolutely phenomenal. Your experience in Greek life is very similar to mine.
I don’t think I’m “way off base,” I think that I just have the unpopular opinion, which is fine. I didn’t say she shouldn’t take responsibility for her actions, she’s an adult. But I do think that how we are raised plays a huge factor on how we handle certain things. I guess I just don’t understand why they’d give her $90,000 upfront and didn’t just pay for her tuition as the bills come. If she blew the money like that I doubt she never showed signs of poor monetary judgement in the past.
You don’t just wake up one day with values because you reach a certain age. They need to be taught to you.
Of course she has a lot of fault in this but to say that how she was raised had absolutely nothing to do with it just isn’t true.
What a brat. But her parents ARE partially at fault. They completely enabled her! Who just gives a 20 something $90,000… She seems like the kind of girl who’s never had a job in her life because she clearly does not understand the value of a dollar. As much as I hated that my parents made me get a job the day I turned 15 and pay for most of my own things, I’m glad they taught me personal responsibility and that money doesn’t grow on trees. I wouldn’t be surprised if this girl marries some rich controlling man who treats her like crap one day. It’s really sad.
As an outgoing senior I’d like to lend some advice to you. First, TSM is a satirical website. Although there is truth to this post it is exaggerated and there is a sense of humor in it. Second, being a PNM is scary! But that’s why you have awesome recruitment counselors who are carefully selected. They’re the best of the best. When you meet yours, don’t be afraid to express your concerns!
While many parts of recruitment are staged (such as what you wear), it is a tried and true process. Not everyone loves it! But at the end of the day, the purpose is to find girls who will make awesome additions to their chapters and will also listen, learn, and grow.
The kind of girl that Lucky Jo is highlighting in this column just hates all the frilly stuff. The reality is, she’s still going to take a breath before you enter, and when she speaks to you in recruitment, she’s going to talk to you like she talks to every other girl. And if she sees you fitting into her sorority, she’s gonna keep talking and asking and answering questions and it will feel effortless. While she may hate the outfits and the songs, she doesn’t hate YOU. She wants to like you! She wants to meet girls and think “wow, she NEEDS a bid!” Please don’t feel discouraged. Recruitment is a weird thing for everyone involved. But you will find your home and your time won’t be wasted. I really hope this eases some of your concerns!
More like woman gets arrested for assault and battery…
Serious question……. Did you kiss him after?
I thought about this exact accusation myself as I watched the speech again this morning but the original source that this story came from Radar online which is a completely illegitimate source. I did my own research, looked around as much as possible and found that there is absolutely nothing valid about this awful accusation. Not to mention any avid KUWTK watchers know that if anything Bruce always had integrity and I expect in her new life as Caitlin that wouldn’t change. Whether you agree with whether or not she should’ve won the award, it’s not okay to accuse her of manipulating the media for it.
Wow. After his “helpful” maneuver I think it would’ve been totally appropriate for you to free that vomit all over him. Clearly you’re a trooper. Bless.