True life: I’m addicted to my planner. TSM.

My goals for the upcoming semester are basically just to get kicked out of fewer bars. TSM.

Being more proud of your tan than your 4.0 GPA. TSM.

Giving a guy your number but never actually texting him back. TSTC.

Thou shalt never leave the bar with an unfinished drink. TSM.

Long T-shirts, short dresses. TSM.

He ain’t worth the vodka. TSM.

Feeling accomplished when you’re at a party and haven’t hooked up with any of the attendees. TSM.

Handling your alcohol better than your emotions. TSM.

Risking the fine for skipping a philanthropy to go to a formal you haven’t even been invited to yet. TSTC.

“I couldn’t find water, so I got sangria instead.” TSM.

I like my lashes as black as my soul and as long as the list of people I hate. TSM.

Packing the vodka first on your way back to school as motivation to unpack. TSM.

Ruining your life and liver simultaneously. TSTC.

“Umm…can I get a shirt to wear?” TSM.

Waiting until after formal to break up with him. TSM.

The pictures you take at the beginning of the night being Insta-worthy, and the ones at the end being group chat worthy. TSM.

How could I hate you? I don’t even think about you. TSM.

Telling the salon you want to be “Legally Blonde” blonde. TSM.

Making him watch “Say Yes to the Dress” so he knows what to expect. TSM.