Having a wine glass collection that even your own mother envies. TSM.

Making it a priority to drink every flavor of Burnett’s in rainbow order. TSM.

Easily turning the guy who never has a girlfriend into your boyfriend. TSM.

Every gift you receive revolving around alcohol. TSM.

Getting your boyfriend to apologize even though you were wrong. TSM.

Having a “recruitment voice.” TSM.

Making your boyfriend’s pledges, your pledges. TSM.

The “I’m not wearing makeup” makeup you put on before he comes over. TSM.

The last-minute attempt to iron your shirt out with a hair straightener. TSM.

Being the reason he wins “Hookup of the Week” at chapter. TSM.