Introducing yourself as Barbie when he tells you his name is Ken. TSM.

“I hate that he’s seen me naked.” TSM.

Drunkenly eating a strangers Girl Scout cookies, because it’s your philanthropy. TSM.

“I have a bow for that.” TSM.

Wearing yoga pants counts as exercise. TSM.

Slept over so I’d be his valentine by default. Sucker. TSM.

Leaving with his Patagonia. TSM.

Showing your love for America by servicing a serviceman. TSM.

Online homework ever so easily becoming online shopping. TSM.

Hot glue burns are the battle scars of crafting. TSM.