Drinking a bottle of wine like it’s a bottle of water. TSM.

Getting the president to drop a pledge because he stood you up. TSM.

Inexplicably changing your Twitter name to Elle Woods every time you’re drunk. TSM.

Party girls don’t get hurt. TSM.

“Who do you think will be the first girl in our pledge class to get married?” TSM.

My calorie tracking app needs a “midnight drunk meal” option. TSM.

“Oh my God. You’re such a sorority girl.” TSM.

Sprinkles are edible glitter. TSM.

Feeling personally victimized when your favorite fraternity is on probation. TSM.

“Ha…that’s cute.” TSM.