Spending more money on your little than you ever have on a boyfriend. TSM.

“She had a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair.” TSM.

The audible “Fuck” when you wake up naked and see fraternity shit everywhere. TSM.

Abbreviating words that have already been abbreviated. TSM.

You’re never truly dressed without a monogram. TSM.

The only snap story you really watch being your own. TSM.

The closest thing to a threesome he’ll ever get is being in a picture between you and your little. TSM.

It’s not real until he goes on a tampon run. TSM.

The seamless transition from your school hookup to your home hookup over Thanksgiving. TSM.

Being declared sweetheart at a school you don’t even go to. TSM.