I make shit show look good. TSM.

“Sorry, I’m not dancing. The music doesn’t match my outfit.” TSM.

Getting the entire bar to sing “Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue” to your boyfriend when he gets home from Afghanistan. TSM.

“But then I found out he was a democrat, so I ended it.” TSM.

Using “I’m a legacy” as your excuse for everything, even if it’s not applicable to the situation. TSM.

Yesterday’s dress with today’s shame all over it. TSM.

Guys calling dibs on you three months before formal. TSM.