Never having to pay the cover. TSM.

Piss me off and I’ll put glitter in your AC vents. TSM.

Using Starbucks sample cups as shot glasses. TSM.

I like my men well-raised and well-hazed. TSM.

Wearing letters during the whole month of April because it’s college visiting month. TSM.

“You’re such like a little slice of America.” TSM.

If it doesn’t have your monogram on it, is it really even yours? TSM.

It’s only slutty if you don’t get a t-shirt. TSM.