I like my water like I like my crafts: sparkling. TSM.

“I NEED to make out with someone tonight.” TSM.

Pregaming your breakup. TSM.

Wearing letters on vacation, in hopes of finding sisters. TSM.

Donating new house letters for recruitment because you had spare glitter. TSM.

“What are you gonna wear?” TSM.

The automatic “she’s not that cute” when your best friend mentions her ex’s new fling. TSM.

Saving your calories for wine. TSM.

Liking him less when he’s wasted, but more when you’re wasted. TSM.

Dry rush is a lot like the prohibition. TSM.