“Is that a thing?” TSM.

I only took like four shots because I’m a sober sister tonight. TSM.

Dammit. I really thought I was sober. TSM.

Can I get philanthropy hours for volunteering to be sober sister? TSM.

Your nickname being Stan, short for standards, because you’re always there. TSM.

Getting really worried when you’re notified “______ has tagged you in 15 photos.” TSM.

Giving a hickey to mark your territory. TSM.

Purchasing another item so you get free shipping. TSM.

Having 100+ girls you can pee in front of. TSM.

Your “to craft” list being bigger than your “to do” list. TSM.