Who said you can't be smart and funny? When I'm not writing for TSM, you can find me studying into oblivion, downing a bottle of chardonnay, and/or sobbing for reasons I have yet to understand. All hate fan mail can be sent to [email protected].
Appendix I: What I assume some newlywed blogger is now writing on this very topic. Please refer to the above article as needed for a reality check.
1. Find your “Mr. Right.” The man of your dreams is out there just waiting to find you.
2. Always be yourself. He’ll love you for you.
3. Remember what mom said, “why buy the cow when he’s getting the milk for free?”
4. Do fun couple stuff together to strengthen your relationship–like working out, picking pumpkins, and dragging him to church!
5. Wait until the time is juuuuust right. There’s no pressure when LOVE is on your side!
I’ve never laughed so hard and felt so ashamed at the same time. For as much as I’ve made fun of Jersey Shore, it is embarrassing how much I’m just like them. #FistPump
OMG I was fucking joking, people. I’m skinny and tall and complain to my friends all the time about my “problems”. Their response is a sarcastic “Oh, it’s so hard being skinny and pretty and tall. I feel so bad for you.” Learn to take a fucking joke. Also, fucking learn to correctly use punctuation.
I didn’t mean to offend. I’m tall and skinny, too. It’s definitely not a bad thing, but it’s not always perfect like everyone thinks. Every body style has it’s pros and cons. I just wanted to write something funny about all of our “struggles” that us pretty, skinny, and tall ladies can relate to. You just have to read the article knowing that.
Okay take a chill pill. So first of all, yes this is satire. This is TSM, not World News Tonight. Second, I love who I am, and I wouldn’t change a thing. Finally, this is just a play on the grass-is-always-greener theme. Every girl has at one point been on the other end of “I wish I was as ——- as you!”. The take-home: just be happy as who you are, and embrace the person you are.
BRB, currently planning my next Halloween costume…
CC Cream is my new boo. 10/10 would marry.
My “pseudo-little” had a big before me that dropped, so I sort of unofficially adopted her. Better to have a pseudo-fam than no fam at all.
Appendix I: What I assume some newlywed blogger is now writing on this very topic. Please refer to the above article as needed for a reality check.
1. Find your “Mr. Right.” The man of your dreams is out there just waiting to find you.
2. Always be yourself. He’ll love you for you.
3. Remember what mom said, “why buy the cow when he’s getting the milk for free?”
4. Do fun couple stuff together to strengthen your relationship–like working out, picking pumpkins, and dragging him to church!
5. Wait until the time is juuuuust right. There’s no pressure when LOVE is on your side!
You might find me caroling this song this season. Just saying, bravo.
That Pocahontas picture, though. #perfection
You’ve obviously never been to one of my parties. #InvitationOnly
I’ve never laughed so hard and felt so ashamed at the same time. For as much as I’ve made fun of Jersey Shore, it is embarrassing how much I’m just like them. #FistPump
Perfectly put. #preach
LOVE this. The mom power is all too real. Anddd I’m pretty sure I went to the wrong school. #swoon
Same here, girl.
Glad you liked it! I was definitely surprised in real life when it happened, too.
Thanks, hot piece!
Read my comment to fuckyoubitches and learn to take a joke.
OMG I was fucking joking, people. I’m skinny and tall and complain to my friends all the time about my “problems”. Their response is a sarcastic “Oh, it’s so hard being skinny and pretty and tall. I feel so bad for you.” Learn to take a fucking joke. Also, fucking learn to correctly use punctuation.
I didn’t mean to offend. I’m tall and skinny, too. It’s definitely not a bad thing, but it’s not always perfect like everyone thinks. Every body style has it’s pros and cons. I just wanted to write something funny about all of our “struggles” that us pretty, skinny, and tall ladies can relate to. You just have to read the article knowing that.
Okay take a chill pill. So first of all, yes this is satire. This is TSM, not World News Tonight. Second, I love who I am, and I wouldn’t change a thing. Finally, this is just a play on the grass-is-always-greener theme. Every girl has at one point been on the other end of “I wish I was as ——- as you!”. The take-home: just be happy as who you are, and embrace the person you are.