Anyone who tells you to cut your hair short, hates you. TSM.

Doing small hip raises while laying in the tanning bed. Multitasking. TSM.

I only date guys that know how to deep sea fish. TSM.

Having an unhealthy addiction to the Kate and William wedding. TSM.

Andre is the only foreign guy I’ll get close to. TSM.

Always looking like an “after,” and never a “before.” TSM.

Going to a steakhouse and ordering a salad. TSM.

My iPhone now recognizes “sorostitute” as a word. TSM.

Mom jeans. NS. Mom’s genes. TSM.

8 minute abs. TSM.