33. You got so drunk that you misspelled “substitute” and “skanky.” The latter of which I can’t believe you haven’t entered into your spellcheck dictionary.
This one’s easy. Take the makeup off is you’re hooking up at your place; leave it on if you’re hooking up at his place. Let his ruined sheets remind him of the dignity that you left behind. Plus he might call you later to go down to Target with him and pick up some new sheets since there’s no way he will tell his mom that his sheets were ruined when he banged that blue monkey girl from Avatar.
You don’t get put in the friend zone, you put yourself in there. Leave. It’s pretty easy, you just walk away. No one’s forcing you to continue hanging out with someone who’s not interested in you sexually. If you actually think you can put your feelings aside and legit be friends with this girl, cool. Who knows, maybe she can hook you up with one of her friends. If not, you’re free to bail at any time.
You’re not entitled to her pussy, and she’s not entitled to your time or attention. If you each want different things from each other, there’s no reason to stick around pretending otherwise. Just move on.
But seriously, guys don’t mind being Friend Zoned if it’s sincere. What we don’t like is when friendship is offered as a consolation prize, as in “Thanks for playing, we have some lovely parting gifts for you.”
Definitely retire the group costumes; they work only if the girls spend all night standing together. You have any idea how difficult it is to hook up with One Blind Mouse when the other two are standing there saying “OMG Natalie you can’t hook up with him you have to stand here with us all night or no one will understand our costumes!” And the Minions, separately, aren’t Minions, they’re just nerdy sluts who think it’s the summer of 1993.
This could have been written by my dog.
If coach had put me in fourth quarter we would’ve been state champions…
I really appreciate your commitment to commenting here
The guy from Juno is dating Hermione Granger?
33. You got so drunk that you misspelled “substitute” and “skanky.” The latter of which I can’t believe you haven’t entered into your spellcheck dictionary.
18. Your Dad: Get help. Seriously. From me. I took a Psychology class.
This one’s easy. Take the makeup off is you’re hooking up at your place; leave it on if you’re hooking up at his place. Let his ruined sheets remind him of the dignity that you left behind. Plus he might call you later to go down to Target with him and pick up some new sheets since there’s no way he will tell his mom that his sheets were ruined when he banged that blue monkey girl from Avatar.
OMG I WAS GOING TO BE ‘IT!’ Ok one of us is going to have to get a new costume and it isn’t going to be me, Amanda!
Wow it’s even on sale! Lucky day!
Which I’m not going to do even if it results in destruction of the Universe.
Oh. I read the headline and assumed “Go to the pumpkin patch” was a euphemism for going down on you.
You don’t get put in the friend zone, you put yourself in there. Leave. It’s pretty easy, you just walk away. No one’s forcing you to continue hanging out with someone who’s not interested in you sexually. If you actually think you can put your feelings aside and legit be friends with this girl, cool. Who knows, maybe she can hook you up with one of her friends. If not, you’re free to bail at any time.
You’re not entitled to her pussy, and she’s not entitled to your time or attention. If you each want different things from each other, there’s no reason to stick around pretending otherwise. Just move on.
Seriously. Group costumes are the ultimate cock-block because the girls will refuse to separate from each other the whole night. Waste of time.
Those chicks are supposed to be Minions? I thought that was an attempt at “sexy bumblebee” or some shit.
But seriously, guys don’t mind being Friend Zoned if it’s sincere. What we don’t like is when friendship is offered as a consolation prize, as in “Thanks for playing, we have some lovely parting gifts for you.”
That’s *massive* four-inch meat torpedo to you, ma’am.
Is that what a vagina looks like? Damn no wonder I can never get it in on the first try.
Definitely retire the group costumes; they work only if the girls spend all night standing together. You have any idea how difficult it is to hook up with One Blind Mouse when the other two are standing there saying “OMG Natalie you can’t hook up with him you have to stand here with us all night or no one will understand our costumes!” And the Minions, separately, aren’t Minions, they’re just nerdy sluts who think it’s the summer of 1993.
Two words: Graduate School
So I guess you and Intern Wes will only just be friends after all…