I got 99 problems, but a bid ain’t one. TSM.

Skin type: glitter. TSM.

Having a pink pepper spray dispenser. TSM.

Being a boss bitch, not a basic one. TSM.

Drinking wine because it’s classier than beer, and because, hello, it has a higher concentration of alcohol. TSM.

More excited about the theme than the party. TSM.

Not letting the weather get in the way of your outfit. TSM.

Philanthropy events are like the gym. You don’t want to go, but once you’re there, you feel pretty good about yourself. TSM.

Only Standards can judge me. TSM.