Resting up FOR the weekend, not OVER the weekend. TSM.

One side of his cooler already being better than all sides of his last. TSM.

Wearing his letters just as often as your own. TSM.

Having to begin every story about the night before with “So apparently…” TSM.

Your phone auto-correcting “monogamy” to “monograms,” because only one of those things is relevant to your life. TSM.

Hooking up with the t-shirt chair of a fraternity because, well, he’s the t-shirt chair. Duh. TSM.

Successfully tricking the whole new pledge class into believing they didn’t get their number one big. TSM.

Joining a bottom tier sorority. Graduating from a top tier sorority. TSM.