Shamelessly adding four bottles of champagne to your mom’s shopping cart. TSM.

“Don’t take me home until I’m very drunk. Very drunk indeed.” -Holly Golightly. TSM.

Why do sorority girls snap? Because you can’t clap with a drink in one hand. TSM.

You can’t regret what you don’t remember. TSM.

I mean, he was “dance floor makeout” cute, but not “go home together” cute. TSM.

Peppermint White Mochas are the new PSLs. TSM.

Teaching new girls the art of “frat hopping” when they freak out about being invited to multiple parties in one night. TSM.